Conflicts at work are inescapable and frequently result from misunderstandings, disagreements of viewpoint, variations in background, etc. as individuals from diverse backgrounds and experiences collaborate to achieve organizational objectives.
Conflicts can be resolved easily with proper communication and tackling the problem with practical solutions. It is imperative to deal with conflict in a way that fosters understanding, respect, and a positive outcome.
There are certain things to keep in mind while resolving a conflict, like the need to be impartial and fair. There are certain phrases that can actually exacerbate the problem, resulting in a breakdown of communication and further difficulties.
Here are the 5 phrases not to use while resolving workplace conflicts:
1. “You are overreacting”: When you tell someone that “you are overreacting,” you invalidate their feelings, which can escalate the conflict further. This can make the other person act in a defensive manner. Instead of saying that they are overreacting, try to understand their feelings and find where the problem lies to derive a fair and practical solution to the problem.
2. “You always/never”: You should not use “you always” or “you never.” These kinds of absolute phrases should be avoided at all times, as this can again make the other person go into defensive mode and make them feel as if they are being attacked, thereby making him/her not cooperate in resolving the issue. Rather than making broad generalizations about the conflict, try focusing on the specific behaviour or action that caused it.
3. “I’m sorry but…”: If you begin your apology with “I’m sorry, but…” you can undermine its sincerity. It may give the impression that you are blaming them for the conflict. Instead, take responsibility for your actions and express a sincere apology that emphasizes how they affected the other person. You may say, “I apologize for how my actions have affected you.” This will showcase that you genuinely feel bad about the situation, and they will be ready to forgive or comply with you.
4. “I don’t have time for this”: By saying this, you can make the people feel that the conflict was just unnecessary, and they will feel insulted and unheard. It will make them feel that their concerns are not your priority, and therefore they will feel devalued, which will impact their performance at work. Instead, schedule a time for both of you to talk more deeply about the issue.
5. “That’s just the way it is”: You should also avoid saying “that’s just the way it is,” as it gives the impression that you dismiss the other person’s concerns. This can leave the person feeling unheard and disrespected, and they will feel that their feelings and emotions are invalid. They might comply with the apology or solution at that time, but it will affect the long-term relationship. Instead, acknowledge the other person’s concerns and work together to come up with a solution that suits all parties involved.
End note
If you are a manager or leader, you should remember these phrases and avoid using them when resolving disputes among your team members. You should check out Compliance Prime if you are interested in learning more about resolving and managing inevitable workplace conflicts.
